Plans

k, here's the deal:

I work in technology.

You're supposed to write about what you know.

Theoretically, I should be able to write about technology.

Right?

Well... here goes. This one may evolve over several posts.


PLANS

...they say the best-laid plans... well, you know.

Greggy had a problem. He always had problems, but this was actually someone else's problem. He had a bizarre network traffic fluctuation which he was having problems tracing.

Here and there, through various ports and in an out of switches, routers, servers and clients, he saw packet counts creeping up as more and more data gets shuffled around in a perpetual game of tennis that never ended.

He could swear it was alive.

"Hey, boss..." he called to Evan. Any time he called Evan boss, Evan knew there was trouble.

"Mate, you've gotta stop calling me that..."

"Forget it, man, this is just too crazy to figure out..." Greggy showed him the stats he saw creeping up, told him that people were complaining that things were working slowly, then quickly, then slowly in fits and bursts.

"Well, it's gotta be a virus."

"Everything checks out clean, though."

"New one?"

"Been through the latest updates on all the big ones, Symantec, McAfee..."

"What's crept up the most?"

"This server here." Greggy logged onto a little-used file server, cut off from the internet by a firewall so intense you could almost actually feel the burning as you tunnelled a connection to the thing.

"Uhm, that server's so secure it's virtually disconnected from the net. It's on it's own VLAN, too. Plus the logins are so nondescript... there's not even an Admin account."

"I know. But it's all coming from here." Greggy couldn't figure it out. He pushed his glasses up his nose, determined to work it out, and checked the server's current load.

Suddenly, a system message appeared:

Hello gstorey@support.com. Leave me alone.

"...uhhh, you seeing what I'm seeing?"

"Yep. You've totally got a virus... somehow..." said Evan, obviously wanting to walk away.

"No. Not possible. This server's never used by anyone, remotely, onsite, anything." Greggy triple checked the logs, but this was a secure server for a reason. "Yep, noone's been on this box for two months. Our virus scanners are updated every week. There goes your virus theory."

Greggy and Evan stared at the screen for another minute in silence, wondering what else to do. Then:

Now that you've checked the logins for the past month, you will know that I am no virus.

Greggy and Evan began to worry. What the hell...? This made no sense. This was like water getting into an airtight locker in the middle of the ocean. And what's more, how could... whatever was going on... know what they were thinking?


That'll do for now, more later.